Friday, May 15, 2009

Multi-National Collaboration

I try to buy American. OK I used to. I owned a Chevy, a Ford, a few more Chevy's, another Ford, a Dodge. But then I bought a Honda and now I own another Japanese car... I used to own a Motorola phone and I own HP computer equipment. But even if it has an American name, it's typically not made here.

Remember Mr. Rogers? My favorite part of the show was when he'd go to the crayon factory or the shoe factory or whatever other manufacturer was interesting and available. I'm sure that 90% of those companies are gone now, or at least the factory that Fred visited is now gone. It's pretty sad.

I still love watching How it's Made because I love how things are manufactured. But I just bought something today that was a little disturbing and got my mind wandering. It's actually sad, but everything is made in China. In fact my 7 year old checks stuff at the store to see where it's made, and I don't have to tell you that 99% of the time, it's China.

Hand Carved Kenyan Couple in Traditional Attire- made in China of course.

No, that's not what I bought. I'm just making a point. And of course I have a 5PM real work deadline so writing this is the worst thing for me to do, but I'll try to be brief.

Ever hear of a Vintnor's Blend variety of wine? Ravenswood makes one and it's actually quite good for an inexpensive wine.
But isn't that just a fancy way of saying "Mat Drink"? As my fellow imbibers might know, a mat drink is what you get at a bar when the bartender collects the overflow booze that spilled when he was filling shots. That means that the mat has vodka, tequila, gin, whiskey, schnapps, and whatever other alcohol was served. There might even be some beer and mixer juice as well.

If you order a mat drink the bartender picks up the mat and pours the contents into a glass for you to drink. Yummy.

So this brings me to the purpose of today's entry. I shop at a local Kroger's chain of stores called Fry's. You know Kroger? They're a national grocery store chain that has regional names like Fry's, Ralphs and Smiths. It's no Trader Joes, but it's just as good if not better than your mainstream grocery stores. So I went in to buy a few things for a BBQ we're having tommorrow and the ad said that 93% ground beef was like $1.99/lb. That's pretty good so I figured I should stock up. I get to the meat section and the butcher points out that the ones on sale are tubes of ground beef wrapped in plastic- sort of like the Jimmy Dean sausage or Pillsburry cookie dough.

Now I've never bought this format of beef but I know the store and assume that it's good quality. So I bought like 4 of these things and took them home to split into one pound servings to freeze. And that's when I noticed something. Remember, I like to buy American... but I guess some products come from other countries. Sure enough, the label of the package says "Product of U.S.A., Canada, Mexico, New Zealand AND Australia. That's right, the operative word is "AND".

So how does this work? Do they get a mix of international cows, slaughter them and ensure that there is an equal mix of each country? What happens if the Kiwi cows are running late because their ship is stuck in customs? Could I claim false advertising because my family is being gypped of our normal Nicole Kidman beef? And how do I prove this? And are the overseas cows alive on the big freighter just mooing and getting seasick? I've now got a Far Side image in my head that I can't shake with them staging a coup of the ship. Or is it a technicality since they don't clean the grinding machine regularly, so you might be getting bits of Aussie cow with your Canadian variety. And since we're being disgusting here, when you eat a chicken sandwich, you're eating one half a breast from one chicken. But the thought of multiple cows blended together is enough to make me want to hang out with Pamela Anderson... you know, for PETA purposes- I wouldn't stare at her, I'd just hold a protest sign next to her and talk about the weather.

Gotta run! We're having tacos tonight and I'm cooking!

1 comment:

danny said...

66 mustang! God bless America. Anyway I found this blog from your post on the Carolla site. I don't know if your a podcast fan in general or just a fan of Ace (it sounds like it from your rant on cattle) but if you are looking for new podcasts you should check out or if you prefer itunes just search shoddy radio. We love to hear any feedback good or bad if you ever get a chance to listen and if not good luck finding a single nation beef supplier.
Thanks Danny